What an Interview !!!!

CA. SUJAL MEHTA (Service) (3316 Points)

20 December 2008  

 /BEST INTERVIEW - [Office Humor] 

 

Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

 

Candidate: I am SAMEER GUPTA. I did my Tele Communication engineering from

 

BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.

 

Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard

 

of this college before!

 

Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission

 

into it . What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly! in 12th.I

 

was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to

 

call him `baap') - "I can not invest so much of money".(The baap actually said

 

"I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this

 

college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be

 

related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

 

Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your

 

engineering.

 

Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you

 

know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis

 

tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and

 

3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

 

Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.

 

Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try

 

to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches

 

really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.

 

Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

 

Candidate: No, no… I am talking about Exams!!

 

Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?

 

Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I

 

would complete it. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job

 

for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra) through some relative.

 

Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?

 

Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing `lower' education

 

itself was so much of pain!!

 

Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have

 

you worked?

 

Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current

 

platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can

 

see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the

 

places in Mumbai)

 

Interviewer: And which languages have you used?

 

Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in

 

German, French, Russian and many other languages.

 

Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?

 

Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher

 

version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new

 

language VD!

 

Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

 

Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the

 

language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

 

Interviewer: What is your general project experience?

 

Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of the times

 

they are in pipeline!

 

Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?

 

Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since

 

joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that

 

Bench was another software like Windows.

 

Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?

 

Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and

 

Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call

 

and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like -

 

`Showstoppers ` , `hotfixes',

 

`SEI-CMM','quality','versioncontrol','deadlines' , `Customer

 

Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!

 

Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?

 

Candidate: Not much.

 

1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.

 

2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have

 

deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.

 

3. I believe in flexi-timings.

 

4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I

 

would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.

 

5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to

 

avoid breakdown due to overwork.

 

6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term

 

preferably 2-4 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and

 

Europe. But considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in

 

2007, I don't mind going there in that period. As you can see I am modest and

 

don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?

 

Interviewer: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our

 

organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. Welcome to

 

:DINFOSYS .. :D:D