Wacky definitions

Geeta (chief accountant) (3368 Points)

13 August 2011  

 

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich. 
Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills. 
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either" 
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present. 
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece. 
Dictionary: A place where success comes before work. 
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on. 
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early. 
Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after. 
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills. 
cl-assic: Books, which people praise, but do not read. 
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight. 
Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life. 
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth. 
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. 
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together. 
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes. 
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions. 
Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death.