1) A notice board in BJP conference room.:
"please keep mobiles in MANMOHAN SINGH mode"
2) SUNDAY TIMES 2040.
a) Kasab dies in jail at 70 due to high cholesterol (too much mutton biriyani).
b) The PM ( Rahul Gandhi) said Opposition comments on the extravagant expenditure on Kasab is unwarranted.
c) Govt has spent only Rs 18500000000 so far.
d) Opposition asks why ministers expenses to visit to Kasab (to check his well being) should be included in reimbursement sheet.
e) Kasab family thanks Indian Govt. as Kasab never had biriyani in his younger days in Pakistan.
f) Pawars family owns half the world and also controls, the Russian and Japanese mafia.
g) Golmaal 27 released. Tushar Kapoor, still can't speak or act.
h) A. Raja's grandson arrested for 16G scam
i) Amnesia is passed on. Kalmadi's family say they dont know who Kalmadi is.
j) Girl in Delhi walks 25 feet safely, without getting raped.
k) Lakshadweep Lions to join as the 63rd team in IPL.
l) Pawar's grandson who had become a Malayalee in 2011 resigns from the Trustee post of Padmanabha Swamy temple, says there is nothing more to loot.
m) Pakistan says Tamil Nadu & Karnataka was always part of Pakistan. PM, Rahul Gandhi says the issue can be resolved by talks. Hina Rabbani's daughter to come to India for mediation, will talk to S.M. Krishna's grand son.
n) Teacher " where is the CAPITAL OF INDIA?"
Student " in Swizerland" as all Capital has been transferred there.
o) Kasab's old letter found written to Osama bin Laden in 2010. You can hide in India. Letter now has antique value & can be auctioned at 5000 dollars.
p) Constitution amended. Now foreigners can become PM.
q) Because of so many acts and no law, one lawyer is allowed to take only one case during his life time. Each case will be attended by one judge only. If the judge dies during the 40 years of the case, his son will automatically become a judge and will continue the case.
r) Manmohan Singh award for the dumb and noiseless declared.
s) Fortune 500 "All the 500 richest men in the world are from India"
t) India now biggest lender of money to America, Japan and other poor countries.