Link of the Part 1
/forum/story-roshne-ray-of-light-leading-to-darkness-247067.asp
Link of the Part II
/forum/story-roshne-fighting-her-way-back-to-light-part-2--247157.asp
Roshne and Sameer were celebrating her success as finally she became CS. She was on cloud 9. She wrote a lovely poem for Sameer expressing her love for him and wished for positive reply from his side too. But in response she got to know that Sameer was engaged. The time when she was busy preparing for her CS Professional exam that was the time when Sameer was engaged to Ruchika. The thing which shocked her most was Sameer and Ruchika were in a relationship since 2 years, the time when she dint even knew Sameer. She was in a shock unable to believe the fact which was just revealed to her.
In past one and half year Sameer never told her about Ruchika. She was unable to react at the situation. She wanted to cry out loud but tears dint flow from her eyes. She wanted to question Sameer about it but could not do so as Sameer never told her that he loved her. It was just her assumption that he had same feelings for her. She was feeling too heavy inside. She was unable to take it in. It appeared as someone has took away her support system. Her shield has suddenly disappeared. Her dream world shattered to bits and pieces. Once again she is exposed to hard reality of life. She was all lost in her agony which she had to face alone.
She dint cry as there was no one to wipe away her tears. She dint wanted to lose him. He told her that they can be good friends but she knew it will affect his relation with Ruchika in future. She parted her ways with Sameer as she dint want to do any injustice to Ruchika. But she was unable to forget him. She cant dislike him as he has done a lot for her. If he wouldn’t have been there she would have lost herself long back. It was he who helped her in coming out of her two faced life. But does that give him right to shatter her now. She dint wanted to blame him as he has done much good to her.
(It is my request to readers please don’t be harsh on Sameer and don’t judge him. To err is human. Please remember that he has been a great source of joy and strength to her, when she needed him the most. Its just that he came in her life to show her right direction, to be herself. To provide her required support so she can achieve her dreams. She got a lot of confidence from him. Now his role in her life is over and so he has gone away. And his going away is also for a reason. His going away will make Roshne more independent and practical. He made her love herself too and not crave for relationships. He has taught her all the required lessons of life.)
In this dilemma she cant sit for her exam in the May, 2013 attempt. So she decided to sit in Nov, 2013 attempt and use this time to make herself independent and learn to live alone. (At times we have to take a step back to take a better step ahead). This was exactly what Roshne’s decision shows. (Finally naïve, immature, dependent and impractical girl is becoming understanding, mature and practical). She started to spend quality time with herself. She got more involved in writing as that was the only way she can express her grief. She was weak inside but she started gathering her own strengths and become strong as Sameer wanted her to see. Though she was going through mental agony but still she stood strong in face of the circumstances.
This time was major turning point of her life as was learning to be happy without depending on anyone around her. This was too difficult for her but she has got enough strengths from her past experiences. One evening she went for a ride in shikara (Mayur Pankhi which starts from Millenium Park). Being beside Nature gave her a lot of comfort. The calmness of the nature relaxed her for some time. In morning and evening she often used to go to parks and played with the kids there. The innocence of children helped her to forget negative aspects of the life for the time being. The smile and silly talks of kids were so pleasing that it strengthened her belief in God and in humanity too. She prayed to God to be with her forever. She realized that she was never alone as blessings of God always accompanied her. This was driving her away from her pain.
She started visiting malls alone. She went to Mani square and did bowling. She saw the new 7D movie which was like a ride and this helped her in keeping her calm and feel relax in the new environment. It wasn’t fun but it was far better than sitting at home and thinking about her past. She went for shopping alone. It wasn’t that bad. Infact it was good time pass. Then on March 17th she went to watch Meri Dad ki Maruti and next week Jolly LLB alone. She found that it was really good time pass. One can even remain happy alone. Happiness is inside us and not around us. With passing of each day, she was getting stronger and better.
It has been more than a month since Sameer went away. There wasn’t even an hour when she dint missed him. But she learnt to tolerate the pain and pretend to smile again. From her past experience she knew that this pretence will gradually become natural. These outings really helped her a lot to maintain her mental balance. She is starting to prepare for her CA Final again.
(Next part will be end of story with various messages which two characters Roshne and Sameer wants to convey.)
CAclubindia
