Some definitions ...will bring smile on your face

Darshu (CA) (1580 Points)

13 April 2009  

School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

 

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

 


Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

 


Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

 

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

 

 

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through 'the minds of either'

 


Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

 


Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

 


Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.

 


Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

 


Father: A banker provided by nature. 
 

 

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

 


Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after?

 


Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

 

Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.

 


Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

 

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

 

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

 

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

 


Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

 


Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

 


Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

 


Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death

 


And finally

 

Politician: It is always more expensive to do things cheaply