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Jokes After Exam...

Santhosh Poojary (SIEMPRE AHÍ PARA TI) (15607 Points)

23 November 2010

Congratulations!
Good news for University students
Exams of Uni have been postponed upto next month
To confirm goto site
www.stop dreaming & start studying.com

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14 Replies

Santhosh Poojary (SIEMPRE AHÍ PARA TI) (15607 Points)
Replied 23 November 2010

Q: Woh Konsi Baat Hai Jo Hazaron Saal Pehle Bhi Students Kehte Thay

Aaj Bhi Kehte Hain Or

Qayamat Tak Kahengay?

A: “Bus Kal Se Parhai Start Karaingay”

2 Like

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Santhosh Poojary (SIEMPRE AHÍ PARA TI) (15607 Points)
Replied 23 November 2010

Class ki har ladki ek phool hai,
Usse chahna ek bhool hai.
Jo inki soch mein gul hai,
Samjho uski Compartment ke chances full hai..

Har Sawal Se Dat Kar Larna,
Fekne Me Kami Mat Karna,
Mouka Mila To Peche Bhi Dekhna,
Aur Ek Baath Yaad Rakhna,
Aage Wala Ka Paper Apna Samajhna

To be a “Good professional”,
always start to study late for “Exams”.
Because it teaches
how to manage “Time” and tackle “Emergencies”!!

A student grabbed a coin,

Flipped it in the air & said,
“Head, I go to sleep.”

Tail, I watch a movie.

If it stands on the edge I’ll study:p

3 Like

Santhosh Poojary (SIEMPRE AHÍ PARA TI) (15607 Points)
Replied 23 November 2010

eXams are there,
at the paper u stare;
the answer is nowhere,
which makes u pull ur hair.
The teachers make u glare,
the grades r not fair,
but just like the past 20 yrs,
WE DONT CARE !!

1 Like

George (Chartered Accountant) (649 Points)
Replied 23 November 2010

Teacher: I hope I didn't see you looking at Fred's test paper.
Pupil: I hope you didn't see me either !

Teacher: You copied from Fred's exam paper didn't you ?
Pupil: How did you know ?
Teacher: Fred's paper says "I don't know" and you have put "Me, neither"!

Great news; teacher says we have a test today come rain or shine.
So what's so great about that ?
It's snowing outside !

What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher ?
Lots of blood tests !

What kinds of tests do they give witches ?
Hex-aminations and Spelling tests!

Father: What did the teacher think of your idea?
Son: She took it like a lamb.
Father: Really ? What did she say?
Son: Baa!

Father: How were the exam questions ?
Son: Easy.
Father: Then why look so unhappy ?
Son: The questions didn't give me any trouble, but the answers did !

Father: How did your exams go ?
Son: I got nearly 100 in every subject.
Father: What do you mean, nearly 100 ?
Son: I was just a digit out; I averaged 10!

Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this test
Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you !

Father: Why did you get such a low score in that test ?
Son: Absence.
Father: You were absent on the day of the test ?
Son: No, but the boy who sits next to me was !

4 Like

George (Chartered Accountant) (649 Points)
Replied 23 November 2010

Roses are red,Violets are blue,
I copied your exam paper, And I failed too.

EXAMINER: Never mind what the date is, get on with the exam.
PUPIL: But, sir, I want to get something right.

TEACHER: Why do you always fail your exams?
PUPIL: Because I always get the wrong exam paper.

EXAM QUESTION: Where are the Andes?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: On the end of my armies.

EXAMINER: I told you not to look in your bag. You could have the answers.
PUPIL: I'm not, sir. I'm looking in Jim's bag. He's got the answers.

FATHER: How did you get on with your maths test today?
SON: I only got one sum wrong.
FATHER: Well done. How many sums were there?
SON: Twelve.
FATHER: So you got eleven right?
SON: No, they were the ones I couldn't do.

EXAM QUESTION: Where is Felixstowe?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: On the end of Felix's foot.

EXAM QUESTION: In Great Britain, where are kings and queens usually crowned?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: On the head.

EXAM QUESTION: What did James I do on coming to the throne?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: He sat on it.

EXAM QUESTION: What are the chief minerals to be found in Cornwall?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: Coca Cola and orangeade.

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George (Chartered Accountant) (649 Points)
Replied 23 November 2010

FATHER: How did your exams go?
SON: Great, Dad. I nearly got ten in every subject.
FATHER: What do you mean nearly ten?
SON: Well, I got the nought.

Fred was saying his prayers. God bless my mum and dad and please make Montreal the capital of Canada.
Why did you say that, Fred? asked his mother.
Because that's what I wrote in my exam, explained Fred.

DAD: Well, Son, did you pass your exams?
SON: No, Dad, but I did come top of those that failed.

EXAM QUESTION: Why was the period between 500 AD and 900 AD known as the Dark Ages?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: Because those were the days of the knights.

After an exam the teacher said to a boy, Why have you written by some of your questions, "See Simon Taylor's paper?"
The boy replied, Well, sir, you said we weren't to copy each other's work.

EXAM QUESTION: What was the Romans' greatest feat?
PUPIL'S ANSWER: Learning Latin.

EXAMINER: You will be allowed half an hour for each question.
PUPIL: How long can we have for the answer, sir?

MOTHER: Your history exam marks aren't very good.
SON: It isn't my fault. My teacher keeps asking me questions about things that happened before I was born.

FATHER: Well, Son, did you get a good place in the exams?
SON: Yes, Dad, right by the radiator!

FATHER: Why are your exam marks so low?
SON: Because I sit at the desk at the back, Dad.
FATHER: What difference does that make?
SON: Well, there are so many of us in the class that when it's my turn for marks there aren't any left.

2 Like

(Guest)

THANKS SAN & GEORGE

Very Funny...

(Guest)

Good ones. Keep it up!!!!!!!!

Ankur Garg (Company Secretary and Compliance Officer) (114773 Points)
Replied 03 December 2010

The students were lined up in the cafeteria for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.”

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”

3 Like

Ankur Garg (Company Secretary and Compliance Officer) (114773 Points)
Replied 03 December 2010

The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading.

After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, “Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude…?”

After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, “I guess you’d be eating alone.”

1 Like

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