indian tax structure

Some one Help me on TAX..........
1) Q : What are you doing?
A. : Business.
Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!

2) Q: What are you doing in Business?
A: Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX!!

3) Q: >From where are you getting Goods?
A: From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI!

4) Q: What are you getting in Selling Goods?
A: Profit.
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!

5) Q: How do you distribute profit ?
A: By way of dividend
Tax : Pay dividend distribution Tax

6) Q: Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
A: Factory.
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!

7) Q: Do you have Office / Warehouse/ Factory?
A: Yes
Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!

8) Q: Do you have Staff?
A: Yes
Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!

9) Q: Doing business in Millions?
A: Yes
Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!
A: No
Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax

10) Q: Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
A: Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!

11) Q: Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
A: Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

12) Q: Are you going Out of Station for Business?
A: Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!

13) Q: Have you taken or given any Service/s?
A: Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX!

14) Q: How come you got such a Big Amount?
A: Gift on birthday.
Tax : PAY GIFT TAX!

15) Q: Do you have any Wealth?
A: Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX!

16) Q: To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
A: Cinema or Resort.
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

17) Q: Have you purchased House?
A: Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !

18) Q: How you Travel?
A: Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE!

19) Q: Any Additional Tax?
A: Yes
PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADD. EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!

20) Qus.: Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!

21) INDIAN :: can i die now??
A: wait we are about to launch the funeral tax!!!