DO WE PERFORM OUR DUTY TO OUR PARENT?
The parents nowadays are quite worried about the behavioral changes in their children due to several socio-economical reasons. The gap between parents and the younger generations, is increasing day by day due to which the family bonding is getting weaker and weaker. They have forgotten the countless efforts and sacrifices made by their parents throughout their lives.
Since birth we ate the food provided by them - many lakhs of times!!! Our household expenses, maintenance, educational needs, daily coaching etc., was attended by them free of cost. All our requirements under the sky, from childhood till we started earning our own income, was provided by them at their cost, despite their financial conditions and ability, until we became independent to enjoy and survive in this world. The services of our parents cannot be listed as it will run to volumes. All that we can do in return is our moral and spiritual responsibility to take care of them now when they are helpless
Give them enough money understanding their requirements without their indicating same.
Share time with them to laugh and smile.
Be polite and dont try to control their actions, but politely give your views slowly and softly.
While walking keep pace with them as due to age, they may be slow and stay behind them. Give them respect.
Look after their needs, just asking "shall I bring water, some biscuits, a fruit etc.,? Should i bring tea for you? Are you hungry, baba" etc
Observe their health condition closely and take them for periodical check ups. Sensitive parents will not ask you to do this and that.
Check whether they take their mdicines timely and remind, dont talk about the cost of the medicine and value!!
Take them out where they would like to go, and organise it to their satisfaction.
Go from time to time to public places, parks, restaurants of their choice etc.,
Respect their preferences and likes. Dont force your views and preferences.
They dont demand respect, they deserve it.
When elders arrive or depart, open the door with respect.
Go shoping and watch they select and dont comment on their choices.
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Your choices certainly will differ with theirs and you cannot thrust it on theirs.
Celebrate their birthdays and wedding days with some surprise gifts observing their needs and preferences.
Daily wish them before you go out and return home visiting them in their rooms.
Explain your children the importance of the grand parents and cultivate the habit so that you will be respected when they become grown up!!!
When you come back to home, visit them first in their room.
Dont criticise their friends and their manners, dresses etc., and talk ill of them. They have not come to see you,or care for your views, which please remember.
In any matter of discussions where the views of yours and the parents differ try to follow their views as much as possible finding a compromising solution without hurting feelings. Remember their sacrifices and time, and you owe them immeasurably which they never asked for. Going their way with your supporting ideas would be ideal patiently and politely.
Disposal of old parents to old age homes, and separate care homes is a crime unpardonable. Rememer their hardship and difficulties in bringing you up and putting up with your tantrums and obstinacies unmindfully. Dont be ignorant..
At the dinner table, first serve food to them and then to others
A word to parents also -- Please for heaven's sake dont mention how much troubles and sufferings you had in bringing up your children in front of them or talk about the money you spent on their studies and maintenance etc. This is not settlement of account matter. Love begets love which please remember and dont degrade yourself. You should not demand respect but command it.
CAclubindia
